Archive | July, 2011

Moving Forward

22 Jul

Things are moving along. We have a reception date and venue as well as a photographer, Steve, a dear friend of mine. There are other things in the works but I believe in jinxes so I will have to keep them to myself until they have solidified a bit more.

Concurrent with what is going on in our home life, B is finally working behind the scenes on tasks he finds more his style. Or at least what he is more interested in. I can tell he is excited as he is consumed with work and unfortunately for me, extreamly distracted.
We are going home this weekend to see his parents. They are not currently in the loop and I know it is silly but I am terrified curious about a couple of things. Like whether they think I am worthy enough to take their name or if it matters that I am hispanic as they are from a different generation. More aged than one would expect for having a son in their 30’s. B has never had to worry about such things since my parents already treat him like family. They remember him from when we dated in high school. Mother has a chore for him everytime we go home. Dad phoned him yesterday about car parts and a cousin’s birthday party. And my sister finds him as humourless as she finds me.

But nevermind the worry. I am all too excited to hear the words come out of B’s mouth. That he and I are getting married. I am uneasy hearing myself say it. But if he says it, it reinforces that it is indeed happening. Not that I am not having fun making plans and setting dates for this apptointment and that, but I get absolutely giddy when he has an idea or makes an effort. Talking about it with his family makes me look forward to going home.

So for now, Life with B is on an upswing in all directions and all in all things are great. Even though we are not having a huge shebang, there are still many things to get done and funny enough, I feel like I am planning all these things for somebody else. It is all very exciting but we are not getting carried away. I haven’t even changed my Facebook Status. Maybe because I don’t want to turn into this.

July 4th

13 Jul

I don’t quite remember what we did last July Fourth. It was the holiday weekend before I started the job that made me appreciate weekends and name each day of the week with a tag. “Ugh, Monday.” “It’s only Tuesday?” “Yea Wednesday” though the only recognition Thursday gets is that it’s the day before Friday. A shame really.
I had been eyeing my list of Holidays counting down to my upcoming three day weekend.
Well, my Dad spammed my Saturday,(I love you Dad but seriously, I just saw you two weeks ago). Sunday, B ran errands before we lied our old souls down for a nap in preparation for a friend’s birthday party, which we of course slept through. Monday morning while walking through the dogpark I mentioned to a girlfriend my plans to do absolutely nothing for the rest of the day.
Enter B’s sickness. This had first occured the Monday after Father’s Day. I kept the man hydrated and chalked it up to a stomach bug. He is retching now. Not puking, not throwing up, not a lean over and bleeehhh, but a noise from the core of his insides, telling me that this is not normal. When a grown man is curled up holding his stomach confessing to a woman, “it hurts so bad”, it is time to drive to the ER.

I will spare you the obvious complaints of the wait and how they keep hospitals in the negative of degrees, and skip right on to when they wheeled him away 8 hours later for an appendectomy.

The second he was out of sight I finally let myself cry. I cried with worry. I cried with relief. I cried for our lack of commitment. I cried at the thought of living my life without him. And I am crying again typing this out.

The pang that stuck was the commitment part. There have been many conversations and an overt knowing that we will get married and until recently that was enough. We have a warm and lovely home which we share with two spoiled animals. We have picked out our dream house. We have also been trying to start a family and have kicked around a few names. But somehow when a nurse questioned who I was to him, all of the trueness of our love and dedication was obliterated with his utterance of “my girlfriend”.
“Girlfriend” doesn’t convey what our relationship is. Girlfriends still wear make-up. Girlfriends don’t fold holy boxer shorts. Girlfriends still think everything he does is cute. I have put too much time and effort into getting that heart of his to realize it needs me to have an outsider think I am some tart he has been playing house with for a few weeks.
Side Rant:
The next available is even worse. “Significant Other”. Ugh. This label is just as stupid as “Girlfriend”. It says, “I am his girlfriend BUT I am significant, I swear. No, really.”

I gave B a few days to let the wounds begin to heal before I tore him a new one. Not really but I did start a dialogue. It was about a few thoughts I had had occupying my brain but it stemmed from the want of that entire hospital staff to know just how much that precious, precious man means to me. Wanting to say, I am his wife and my world would end if anything ever happened to him because he is my world, so you had better take good care of him.

We are planning to marry next month.

Some Favorite Pics

10 Jul

Our first hotel stay.

A Kiss in the Morning

Winter Beers

Couch Time

The Snorks